Hi mate, I’m glad I had someone reply on here was worried no one would, I have gone through a lot over the last couple of years, cane out of a 7 year relationship childhood lovers, had 3 children, 1 who was sadly taken from us so early and 2 I no longer see I am fighting for them but Its just circles currently, my current partner I haven’t been with long but it feels like forever. Before we got together I had a end of life deadline. I had no job I had no house no friends. I brought 2g of mdma to take all at once on the 26th april this year. I was trying everything to get jobs get everything, she gave me a job and let me come and stay with her until I sorted myself, again we wasn’t together at this time we was just seeing each other as mates there was feelings but none thrown on the table, I told her that I was gonna end it all in 2 days as that’s my deadline to everything. She cried and cried because I came into her life and made her happy that’s when I realised that I was given a 2nd chance at life, to live and love again have feelings for someone, I can’t tell her I’m so scared she will leave me I’ve hid it for so long, my main drug and alcohol worker who I’ve worked with for the whole of this year leaves the company next week so my details will be transferred to another worker which I’m happy about but scared to admit this problem also. If I hadn’t of met my current girlfriend I would love to of not be stopped in the park that day. But I value everything in my life now, my job my home my girlfriend everything