My husband is the same, on and off it recreationally for years too and he has admitted now that it has turned into something different. I have known that it was a problem for a few weeks but didn’t realise to the extent. Now I do and I feel lost as I have nobody to talk to apart from him or this group as nobody I know would understand. I feel like I have enabled it in the beginning and I’m hoping to god that the stuff that he says is going to work. He has taken off the contacts and has offered tests which I wasn’t going to do but now reading your post I think I will. I feel like I want to give him the benefit of the doubt to make it different and change but also am acutely aware that he has to change habits, lots and even if he manages to stop for a while there will be a reason at some point where it will happen and then he won’t tell me and the cycle will start again.
