You’re right, every time I find myself in pain over the potential fact he will find someone else, I think realistically they can’t sustain a healthy relationship with anyone whilst drugs are involved, they will never be able to compromise and they will always think selfishly, it comes above everything. The only person who would put up with it is someone else who uses. And you must keep reminding yourself in the long term, you will be the best off here. You have a new shot at happiness, whereas he will always be relying on some kind of ‘fix’ and he’ll always be battling with these demons for the rest of his life. Even whilst my boyfriend was clean and relatively happy, when i think about it I was always on edge, every time he went out or he went quiet for a period of time I would panic, i was always treading on eggshells and i was always scared he was just gonna leave me again, which he proved to do. It’s so hard when you’ve been codependent on someone for so long, but a life with an addict will always be painful and chaos so even though this pain is intense right now, i really have hope we will be much better off without them in the long run.
