Hi HW
Thanks for sharing. The fact he us staying clean after years of abusing drugs it’s a miracle in itself.
My experience tells me that your instincts are right. He needs to have some independent support outside of just yours. Say you stay separated and dont reconcile, he would be putting everything on you and then what?
A healthy way to do it is mix it up. Councillor, doctors and maybe support from people who have been in same spot he has. I’m wary of keeping on suggesting meetings, but I found them really helpful for identification and finding a way to sort myself out and clear the wreckage I caused. They aren’t for everyone though and I dont subscribe to anyone who doesn’t do meetings is not an addict, as that isn’t true.
You did the right thing by yourself though – enabling someone to carry on like that will only go one way. Do you have enough support from friends and family yourself?