This is so hard Kate, I really feel for you. With this stuff there is no manual or guidebook, it’s not like fixing a leaking tap or fridge sadly.
I always rember a line I read in the AA text which said something along the lines of ‘No man wants to admit he is bodily or mentally different from his fellows’ – I certaiy didn’t as I was petrified of admitting it. That thinking kept me sick for years.
Part of the daunting thing about admitting you have a problem is the sheer amount of fixing you have to do with all the carnage you have caused. Many people don’t want to face it and carry on into oblivion. Also recovery takes a long time – that prospect to someone who wants an instant fix to feel better is also daunting.
I know you are worried about his job, it’s likely that if the drug use carries on that will be affected any way. If he carries on using it will be far worse than losing a job.
I assure you that anyone who is willing can and will recover, if I did, anyone can