Oh I definitely ‘coddled’ my son too. As a very young mum, who had a period of homelessness & issues myself – I spent years trying to make up for what I thought were MY failings. So although I had rules & routine, I let him get away with a lot of things that I refuse to allow my other children to do. I guess I have learnt from my mistakes.
He had access to money from a young age & influences from his dads side of the family. They are drink dependant & his dad has huge drug issues too. I regret the choice of man I made his father, but at 15 what did I know?
On a good day I refuse to look back & have regret / guilt. On a bad day I consume myself with it & it takes over. I understand that I did what I did at the time & I cant go back. Living with a child that has drug issues to this extreme is like living with grief all the time, its exhausting & I hear you .