Hi Spottydog
Welcome to the forum. I’m sorry to read your sad post. If you read the other threads, you’ll realise that we’re all affected in different ways by our loved one’s addictions.
Its so difficult to talk to anyone as you feel a sense of shame.
I don’t have all the answers unfortunately, but there’s a lot of good advice and support from others in similar circumstances.
The priority is you and supporting your children. So sad that they have been affected. I know my daughter is affected by my son’s behaviour with drink and drugs, it gets her down but she’s a bit older.
I hope you all get the help and support you need soon.
Take care
Lx