Reply To: My fiancé’s addiction is destroying my life

#19648
kklost
Participant

I couldn’t not reply.

I feel for you. I can hear your heart breaking.

I have learnt one thing on my own personal journey with my husband. You need support, you need counselling. I wasn’t one for that, I have never had professional help before finding out I had been married to a occasional drug user for 21years.

I cried and cried. I broke into pieces but had to draw my own boundaries. Once I sorted that it made everything clearer.

But after 6 months of sessions I have learnt and I now believe –

This is not your fault

This is not your demons

You cannot help

They only help themselves and on their own terms

Many will tell you not give ultimatums – they don’t work.

But I did exactly that to my husband and have been testing him every two days. He has been clean 6 months.

I know now if he fails even one test I will walk away.

But this has taken me months to get to this strength. Be kind to yourself but be truthful with yourself! Never sacrifice your own happiness for his.

I hope I have helped x

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