Coco1212, I’m just reminded of a friend who’s brother is an alcoholic, he’s had a rocky past, volatile relationships, cutting himself off from family, disappearing, living on the streets. He’s currently back living with their dad. My friend said she wants her brother to look after himself a bit more, eat healthy, drink semi skimmed milk, rather than full fat, which apparently he likes. She was in a disagreement with her dad about milk, because he buys his son full fat, what he wants, even if it thinks it isn’t as good for him. What my friend didn’t realise at the time, she does now, is that by buying full fat milk, their dad isn’t trying to not look after him, he’s trying to keep him safe. If he didn’t support with with he wanted there’d be arguments and my mates brother could go awol again, which is not what anyone wants. Although it’s not the healthiest thing to do, their dad just does it to prevent a worse situation.
A totally different situation I know, but basically sometimes doing what we’d consider good just doesn’t work for everyone. By policing certain rules we risk retaliation.
My bf is a very strong and has been a very violent man. To other men, not to me. He’s a total alpha. He’s never hit me, but accidents have happened in moments of complete anger. I don’t like that really angry side of him. That’s how far things have sometimes gone when I’ve stopped him getting crack in some way or ruined it for him.
Basically Coco I’m encouraging you to please protect yourself and him to a degree. If his anger escalates he could go awol again or worse, I’m hoping he’s not a violent man for your sake.
Again stay safe Coco xx