Coco, sorry, I mean police his rules as in if he tells you to hold Sunday’s dose and he forces you to give it to him there’s a point where you can’t enforce his rule, that’s what I mean. Hopefully I’m understanding everything right to explain that clearly enough.
It is tough, because at the same time you don’t want to be an enabler right?!
I totally relate. Sharing what I did might not be right for you, I just hope it helps. You know your situation better than anyone, only you can know what’s best. I’m sorry that you’re having to deal with all this. You have helped me too actually, thank you for your honesty and opinions, sharing the past few months has really helped me get perspective. I can only tell my friends so much, you know, so no I don’t have them supporting me. Not because they’re judgey, but because they’d only worry if I tell them too much. Also, I don’t like them to think bad of him, he’s my partner. I do have help from my bfs sister. Not so much directly, she doesn’t live close, but she and my bf speak often and she and I get along well, we both want him to be healthy and happy, so although we don’t talk about things, I know I’m not the only one trying to help him build a good life.
Does your bf have any cousins or other family he can connect with?
My bf had a difficult relationship with his dad too. As a kid he was beaten regularly, he also lived in care for a while, he had it rough for sure. He and his dad hadn’t spoken in years until recently. Yes his dad did some really horrid stuff to him as a kid, but his dad’s a frail old man now, my bf has finally got past the anger. That’s helped improve his general well-being for sure, helped the habit subside.
It’s such a complex thing. There’s no one solution to addiction, just ways to manage it and work on what may have contributed to starting it/making it worse in the background. I know for sure that if I leave my bf he’d go mega downhill, I don’t want that to happen, I don’t have to stay, it may not seem it, but my life is better for having him in it and that’s what keeps us going.
Here for you, thanks for your kindness also xxx