Peartree girl
Again I hear some of what your seeing in myself. The one thing I am envious of you and liberty is that your men in your lives talk to you. He never speaks to me, lies yes all the time but be honest NEVER. I give him the benefit of doubt god knows why he always let’s me down. The other night I let myself down. He was doing well and I made a very stupid mistake. He too ‘borrows’ money and it never gets repaid. He has been on crack for about 21 months and just few weeks ago I found out heroin was part of the problem no clue how long he used that for. I been told by a professional that often the 2 go hand in hand. I didn’t know that. And it doesn’t make me feel better. He’s been on methadone for just over a month and at the weekend he went to the chemist 10 minutes before closing and they refused to give it him so of course he used and yesterday he didn’t get it again. He had money yesterday so I think it was deliberate.
I am the same as you in the sense I worry all the time when I’m not with or he’s not in sight. My mind does overtime I automatically believe he’s scoring or something he shouldn’t be.
My life has been turned upside down for the past year that’s when I found out about the crack a year ago.
I really can’t carrying on for another or more like this.
Is he on the mortgage/tenancy? If not it’s easier to get him to leave.
His parents are also the same no longer their problem. Yet I have children to think about which they’ve decided to ignore.
I wish there was no love left, I feel like it would be easier.
I wish someone could give is the answers as to what to do.
It’s so exhausting having an addict in your life isn’t it ?
Why can’t they see the damage they cause ?
The damage the drugs cause ?
The damage the people who sell it to them cause ?