We had the first ‘normal’ day in a week or so, played monopoly with the kids, he hasn’t drunk and he went to a meeting tonight. I’ve told him if he misses a meeting I’m finding him alternative accommodation, not just if he drinks but if he steps off from help. Then the conversation was ‘so you’re going to kick me out of the house I pay for’ (rented by the way) and so I told him he won’t need to pay for it as I will do it myself, get help with benefits, I work full time as well and I will rent out a room so I don’t need his money at all. To be honest I’d rather be skint as a single mum again than go through this continuing cycle, I’ve done it before and I can do it again not a problem! Then it was just him suggesting that I just want to move another man in and replace him, such crap.
The other thing he’s been going on about is that 17 years ago I was drugged and raped by a guy I worked with – not that long after my first alcoholic relationship ended, I put myself in situations and so blamed myself and never reported it. He’s repeatedly asking who the guy is so he can ‘sort him out ‘ it’s just trying to deflect again from what he’s done, I know that but it’s horrible being questioned and feeling cheap and nasty having to relive what happened.
Yes they are definitely the victims and always will be!
How’s the sleep going? Any better?