listen dre, stop blaming yourself, and stop beating yourself up. If it takes time for you to break away from him, as it is for David, it is because you are not ready. We all do things at our own pace, and this is your journey so you can only go at your own pace.
Once you start to reclaim your peace of mind, and can think straight, you will start to see your own self worth. Once this happens, it because difficult to accept someone disrespecting you. So try to now look after yourself. Put yourself first.
I don’t feel I am in pain. I have past that now. I’m angry.. and proud. I won’t be abused ever again by him, or anyone else.
This year can be the new start you need to make the changes to get free of him and start to live your life. Stop torturing yourself. x