Oh I am so sorry to hear about your chemo! Wishing you the very best for recovery and I hope it helps!
Thank you for your wise words, speaking to friends doesn’t help me as they say all the traditional things and I know that the situation is totally different due to addiction. You’re right he could go on a binge and just hide it, he has been doing it long enough. Seeing what you said about your partners’ contact with you recently I can now see that even they don’t know what they want.
I was going to move in with him but now that’s not happening and I will just get myself a place, this is probably a blessing in disguise.
Perhaps he is doing me a favour and removing himself from my life as he is no good. Unfortunately I have known him for a very long time and know what he can be without the drugs and it’s so hard to watch him to do this to himself. He is extremely damaged, and if I’m honest there is nothing I can do for him, or to bring him back.
He is 35 and does C 2/3 times a week minimum too. He doesn’t smoke weed as it doesn’t agree with him, but if he is on C he will take approx 4-6 heavy duty painkillers or antidepressants to get to sleep, he then lets that take hold of him for a day or 2 and just sleeps whilst not at work and then he is back on it.
My rational brain is screaming at me to see this for what it is, but my heart is missing him terribly and would do anything to have him walk in that door and tell me he made a mistake x