my main worry is I think her family will be as upset as i am that she is behaving like this and destroying our relationship as I think they think I’ve been a really good influence on her life, (something I thought the kids used to see too but seemingly they now think I am the problem!!)
so if I tell them they might get angry with her and upset too and then she will think everyone is against her, which in reality is that everyone is against her addiction making us lose her.
I wish I could find out more really, what happened to make her be this way,
right now I just feel like the longer we are apart the more final it will become,
I’m quite sure she has painted over our bedroom that I had done all insane designs etc, I am kind of upset as it feels like she has probably done that to try and remove me, but at the same time I had said I intend to buy my own place and it isn’t ever gonna be my future home with her anymore so I guess painting over my “masterpiece” ha is fair enough as it isn’t a style she really liked anyway.
but I feel like she has done that within less than 2 weeks since I left, so will she just be removing all trace of me, which will be difficult as I have left such a huge amount of work there, and I cannot remove the huge amount of her from me as it is permanently lodged in my head.
I just feel like she is utterly destroying me mentally.
like being broken down so its like not even the kids appreciate anything I ever did for all of them, it just runs you down so much yet I know I did a lot for all of them and they shouldn’t be making me feel like this, but its so hard not to.
I just don’t know how someone who says they love you can do this as I have spent the last 7 years doing nothing but trying to keep a smile on her face and avoid any problems etc.
she must be so messed up in her head to behave this way it just isn’t normal.