Hi ele1215
Your not alone my husband has a on going alchole problem and cocaine addiction it’s not you remember that, its him his way sadly of coping and being here is a good start for you to focus on you and your well being. Your stronger than you make yourself out to be because your a loving wife and support him thoe he may be unkind with words it’s the drink and drugs talking not him remember that. Hold your head up high and come on here to talk as we all suffer the same pain and together we will make it through. Hang in there