Dear Salboo,
Your circumstances resonate. I’m deeply sorry to hear of your anguish.
I lost my mother in her early 50’s as a result of alcolhism. She hid it very well and by the time we knew it was at the point of no return it was too late. You blame Yourself for not seeing it sooner not knowing how to deal with or actually believing the consequences will turn to reality.
Addiction is an illness the most powerful thing you can do is continue to love your mother who brought you into this world and if you can let her know how much you do care but how much her abusing is destroying you. Stay as strong as you can maybe write her a letter explaining your emotions and grief. If you have done all you can your conscience should be clear.
I tried everything I could with my mum and I hope you don’t suffer mate. Best of luck to you and your family.
Is there any way to get her to rehab?