Hi Esta,
I’m so sorry to read your story and really sorry to see all that you have been through with your husband’s crack addiction.
You sound very strong but if you would like some support I work for a charity called Icarus trust and you may like to contact us as we offer support to people who are in your position as we know how hard it is to live with a family member’s addiction. We have people who you could talk with which might help you through this difficult time.
You can contact Icarus Trust on help@icarustrust.org or visit our website http://www.icarustrust.org
All the best.