I wouldn’t even bother attempting to go to the hotel. You are wasting your time! That may sound cruel and a bit to the point but sometimes your just fooling yourself.
He is having the best time he can have right now getting high and go’s knows what else. He has filled your head with lies and made you beleive he is genuinely upset! But if he was so upset then he would be home with you. He would be caring for you.
The reason I’m saying this like this is because drug users know how to pull the wool over our eyes.
And untill you make a stand and say you have had enough, pack hes bags and give him the ultimatum then he will just carry on abusing your kindness.
Why should you put yourself out to search for him in a hotel? Do you think he has given you one thought whilst being there? Probably not, and I know it’s hard because I have been there, I have spent years worrying whether to cook dinner or whether ill be sleeping alone, or whether he will just be a father. And each time he has failed on all because he’s addiction has come first.
The best thing you can do is focus on you, and in the mean time if you are strong enough pack hes bags and give him the ultimatum.
Xx