Those are very wise words – thank you and very good ideas. I have taken control of the day. I guess it’s still all so raw because I am still accepting what is reality and the life and family life I thought I had doesn’t exist or has maybe never existed!
You are completely right in what you say and I was worried about writing that last post in case I would be judged. But it was a grief for a family situation that’s gone by, as I’m sure as I move through others, birthdays, Christmas I will need to process in the same way.
It is like the person has died. Because they have left and you don’t know what they have really left for. Any type of abandonment or break down is hard but it’s hard to comprehend that they leave for some white powder and put it above everything including the most precious things like their children.
And you do blame yourself and they are always happy to blame you.