Hello
As above i too am in a very similar position. About 2 years ago my marriage started going on to the rocks and the way my husband looked at me and the kids changed. He became heartless. Last year throughout lockdown he basically terrorised me every weekend to the point i threatened him with the police many times. I began steps to get him out of the family home and issued an ultimatum. Towards the end of last year he calmed down and we began patching up our relationship and over Christmas we agreed to stay together as things were not as crazy, though he still quite aloof and unpredictable. Just over 3 weeks ago he dropped the bombshell that he has been on cocaine for 2.5 years. His business partner had found out. I was so shocked i have basically had a breakdown and am now on some hefty medication. On the first day o put him on to cauk. So far i can’t thank them enough because the substance addiction is only a small part of the problem. With their support he is already changing for the better and i see a shadow lifted.
He is facing up to the harm he has caused and wants his life back instead of that horrible, sneaky lonely lifestyle he has been living. And putting us all through hell too. We have lived on eggshells here for many months and it is very, very hard to get to grips with all that has happened.
I have started to gain confidence in his recovery although i know it’s early days. I won’t however allow us to be dragged back and forth. This is his chance and i hope he takes it with both hands and does not let go.
I do see that he is glad to have his life back instead of constantly having that stuff hijacking his every thought. It’s something only they can achieve from within.