Hi Esta! Things are great thank you!! How’s things with you? I’m all moved in to my perfect new home, there’s no one around for miles apart from the neighbours in the house next door – I’m surrounded by sheep, horses (my own included) pigs, it’s fabulous! I’m in a much better headspace – I’ve cut off all communication with the ex & I feel so much better for it. The last time I spoke with him he lied again about something & then when I called him out on it his accused ME of being emotionally abusive & that’s what the doctor & mental health advisor have told him (bearing in mind neither know about his addiction!) – that was the last straw for me, after everything I’ve done for him & everything he’s put me through – he had the audacity to come out with that – it kind of just finally made me realise that it was time to walk away for good for my own sanity. He’s back at work & I think is on track with turning things around which is great but I want nothing more to do with someone who nearly destroyed me & doesn’t even see/care what he’s done, he’s just hell bent on pointing the finger at everyone else – I still think he’s in denial to a certain degree because he can’t face the reality of what he’s done. It’s great being away from the village, I still have reminders & bad days where things come up when I have to go back/see certain people but each day that gets easier. I even joined a dating website for a bit of a confidence boost (My self esteem was on the floor after being repeatedly cheated on AND one being a prostitute) and it’s been a right old laugh! It’s nice to realise that are plenty other people out there that have similar interests to you, that aren’t total sex obsessed idiots & it’s most entertaining! I doubt I’ll ever meet anyone off there but it’s nice to know like there’s a queue of men that would love to take you out & treat you properly & that everything that’s happened wasn’t a reflection on us! I still don’t know if I’ll ever be able to trust someone again but I’m trying not to think too far ahead on that front & just keep taking baby steps to returning to normality. I hope everything is okay with you & things are improving xx
