Hi Gale,
I’m sorry you are having such a hard time because of your husband’s addiction. If you feel that you could do with some help please get in touch.
I work for a charity called The Icarus Trust and we offer help to people dealing with addiction in their family. We have trained people called Family Friends who are experienced in listening and supporting people like yourself to find a way through this. If you contact the Trust you would be assigned a Family Friend who you could talk to in complete confidence.
You can contact Icarus Trust on help@icarustrust.org or visit our website http://www.icarustrust.org
Good luck.