Hi there my situation is so similar to yours I could if written it myself but I’m 10 years In 3 children and not long had my first baby girl 4 months ago my pregnant was hell he abandoned me countless times to go use and it resulted in me getting such awful anxiety that became worse after she was born. I’ve now cut off I only see him fortnightly to see children it’s been one weekend so far he is hot then cold and plays mind games I think it’s because I’ve got myself out of the situation and he’s miserable hence trying to drag me into it. I have felt exactly the same I’ve tried to help him felt sorry for him thought of the man he was before and I will tell you this will only make you feel more pain in the long run as being addicted to cocaine they don’t care only act as they do they think of themselves only, do you feel you’re putting all the effort in with him seeing you’re daughter? Is he a good father despite not paying for her my ex is a good father when he’s with them but acts like he couldn’t care less when he’s not. My best advice for your sanity is concentrate on you and your daughter let him worry about himself and you concentrate on you. If you don’t want to be in the relationship that’s fine too you can walk away put yourself first as if you stay sadly it will only get worse. If you want to chat I check in here most days, take care you are not alone x
