Hi,
So sorry to read your post. What you are going through with your son’s addiction must be very hard for you. I’m glad that you have found this really supportive forum which I hope will help you. If you would like more support for yourself please contact us at Icarus Trust. we are a charity that provides support for people in your situation who are having to deal with addiction in their family. We have specially trained and experienced people called Family Friends. One of them would talk with you if you get in touch and maybe you would feel less scared and find a way forward.
You can contact Icarus Trust on help@icarustrust.org or visit our website http://www.icarustrust.org
All the best.