Hi Chaz,
This is really tough for you being caught in the middle of your husband and your son. If you would like some support for your self please contact us at Icarus Trust. We are a charity that supports people having to deal with the impact of addiction in their family, like yourself. If you contact us one of our Family Friends would speak with you and maybe that would help you to know what to do.
You can contact Icarus Trust on help@icarustrust.org or visit our website http://www.icarustrust.org
Good luck.