Thought I would re-read where I was back in March when I posted and ended my battle with my husband and his addiction.
He did well for a bit. Then cocaine took over as it always does. Same old… missing work, suicide texts. Then denial and apologies. Not being a dad, lies, attention seeking. Let down after let down.
He will never ever beat this as he loves it more than anything. Addiction is cruel, but living with an addict is the cruelest thing ever.0
Sometimes I wish he would just disappear for good. He is killing himself.
Why should my kids have a selfish chaotic addict in and out of their lifes?
I actually resent him. Resent my wasted support and love given to him.
I feel no positive emotion for this man now!!! Just regret I tolerated his shit for so long. Even losing his wife, kids didn’t wake him up.
I just await the call to have to pay his funeral. No hope for him.
Love to the strong affected others still on the roundabout!