Bless you. Do what’s best for you. Its very hard not to worry or give in when you love a person. Sleep is essential for you to cope.
Maybe you are still a little bit in denial… cocaine addiction and the impacts on their loved ones is destroying. We all just deal with it the best way we can.
I hid my husbands addiction and the true impacts for years. I lied to myself the damage he had done to us as a family. I am stronger, but I’m not sure I will ever recover from what his addiction has done to me as a person.
I know I’m happier not dealing with it! I’m sad losing the man I loved so much. But he became the addict more than my husband.
I refuse him access to the kids if he shows up (when he remembers) with any symptoms. I also request a drug test everytime. He refuses most occasions and doesn’t come. I never tell the kids if he’s due to visit and to be honest they never ask for him. (When he was clean, he was a decent Dad).
All 4 have said they like it better with him not here. There’s no atmosphere, no erratic mood swings. I don’t even feel as lonely as I did when he was here.
I’m not blamed or called names or attacked. I sleep a bit better.
Please remember you are being impacted by his addiction, so your journey is no easier than mine or anyone else’s. Your just dealing with it your way.
Sleep! Rest! Look after you xx