Hi,
So sorry to read your story and to see how difficult things are for you due to your partner’s addiction. If you would like to have some help for yourself please contact us at Icarus Trust. we are a charity that offers support to people going through what you are having to deal with addiction in the family. If you get in touch one of our experienced and trained Family Friends will contact you. Maybe talking with one of them might help you to move forwards.
You can contact Icarus Trust on help@icarustrust.org or visit our website http://www.icarustrust.org
All the best to you.