It really does change them, and you. I was living on the edge for so long, worrying, not sleeping, just existing really. We have a child, and I clung onto the good times, of which there were not many.
I’m pretty sure I have PTSD / anxiety because of it, because the fear literally takes over my body when we are invited somewhere where I know alcohol will be. Thankfully he knows that for him, the two things go together, so he cannot drink any more. I never really drank much, so giving that up didn’t bother me at all.
He did have a hole coming in his septum, and I think thats one of the reasons he stopped, his parents never knew any of this addiction, and he cares what they think of him. If his nose got worse he wouldn’t have been able to hide it.
I’d like to think I was a part of him stopping, and deep down I think I am, and his child, but for years that didnt matter.
I tested him for months, and he was happy for me to do so because he wanted to stop. I could tell when he had done it even if he denied it (which he regularly did) his appetite, his eyes, his tone, even the way he text me, I could tell! Crazy life.
If you get tests from amazon, you can test if he doesnt flush the toilet, gross I know, but you’ll at least know you’re not going mad. Trust your gut, its usually right.
I feel so sad that good people are in this position, its like living on a rollercoaster xx