Hello Woo,
Welcome to the forum Woo,
I’m sorry to hear you are having problems with your son. Since there are two adults in the house and if his brother is older, could you not hold an intervention
where as a family you all sit down and discuss the future problems that can occur long term with if he continues to use. It’s great that you are close and can talk about things. If the rest of the family hold regular meetings with him without judging him or criticising you might eventually get through to him.
Do not give him any money and inform extended family not to either. He may steal to buy more cannabis, but there is no point in making things easier for him by funding him.
When my son started smoking cannabis I did speak to the police and they came round and had a long chat with him; unfortunately he took no heed of their advice. My aim wasn’t to frighten him, but to get him some advice from an authoritative figure as my sons’ father has passed away with cancer, ( as far as I can tell my son started at 15 )
I also took my son to see his GP who organised for him to see a child psychologist but I could not get my son to attend the appointments; after three no shows the appointments were cancelled.
I was on my own with my son and there was more stigma regarding drug use back then ( or it felt that way ) but you are in a much better position.
There are three of you and one of him. Try and set boundaries now and stick to them. If your son is intimidating towards you ask your husband for some back up. Try and plan interventions in a calm environment.
I am only speaking as the mother of an addict and can see where I made mistakes.
Nowadays there are many organisations you can find online who can offer support and advice, and of course this forum is amazing too.
Good luck
Love Ivy x