Hi Debbie,
I missed this message earlier on, so sorry.
You aren’t alone, and its so so hard, I get it. Its hard to know what hes really doing but to be unable to raise it. You can only hide your emotions for a while and somewhen you’ll just blurt it out. Well thats what happened to me anyway!
Bottom line – The question I guess you need to ask yourself if, can you live like this, being married to a coke addict? Because thats what you have to deal with, and obviously he’s in denial that he has an issue because he’s still lying to you. Some people can deal with it and get on with life. I couldnt and I didnt want to, and thankfully eventually he stopped. But i’m talking years and years on and off, mostly on.
He is 2 years clean, but I still have dreams revolving around it, I still have that nagging worry in my head that it’ll start again. I don’t think i’ll ever get over it.
Basically, if I hadn’t had a child with him, I would have left, for sure. And thankfully it worked out, but it might not have done.
Nobody would tell you what to do, or judge you. You deserve to be happy and content with life, and if he’s stopping you being able to do that, then theres your answer.
Sending love x