Thank you Bella2210 and Redfox20 for your replies. I did regain some communication with him for a while, and he started to open up in messages that he had addictions and it all got too much and now needs to be by himself to sort things out. That at least has allowed me to understand he knows he’s got addictions and is sorting it out. For me and others no doubt it’s painful when someone turns their back on those who love them and wanted only good things for them. He’s told me he doesn’t want contact with me anymore. It does make you feel awful and you can’t switch off love overnight.
I’ve deleted all photos of him and us, deleted messages between us and returned jewellery he bought me as a way to start looking forward. Addiction is selfish and recovering addicts are applauded and quite rightly so for getting themselves better, yet the good guys like us appear to have our feelings and emotions disregarded and discarded by someone recovering from addiction. It’s the cruel side of addiction that is often ignored.
Seek good friendships to talk this through with, I am and they are my rock. I’ve spoken to a counsellor and they are brilliant too. Sunnier days are ahead and I hope we all get peace of mind soon and keep reminding ourselves we are good people.