Thanks Maggie 🙂 just talking about it here with people who completely understand is comforting. I think the GP is something i have to do as its basically making a reality of things..just having to admit it will make me confront something that ive normalized. Its only when you admit it to someone you realise that its a bigger deal than i ever wanted to make it. It has become such a routine that i use without thinking twice about it; its just something i do thats as compulsory to me as my morning cup of coffee or brushing my teeth. I remember when i first started, it was so illicit to me; i would think: what are you doing, using painkillers when you have no pain? this is so wrong! then i got a little thrill out of buying them and leaving the pharmacy thinking i got away with something, that they had no idea what i was really up to. Now, its just pure shame buying them..every pharmacy in town and the little village pharmacies where i live (Im from Ireland) all know full well that i must have an addiction. I can barely look them in the eye when i go in as they know what im going to ask for before i open my mouth. A pharmacist in one of them recently just gave me this little smirk and said: ‘Im sorry, we’re out of them’. I knew i couldn’t go back to there again after that. That was her way of saying: ‘Im sick of you coming in here and I’m not selling you nurofen plus anymore’. So thats another reason to quit as well, top of the list being my health, but the shame of buying them is another good reason. Thanks for the support 🙂
