You definitely have not let him down. When they are under the spell of addiction, that’s all they think about. Nothing else matters, only the alcohol, weed, cocaine or whatever. It messes with their brain, they don’t think clearly.
Let him know you love him, and will support him when he’s ready.
But don’t enable him, speak to Icarus trust, they have counselling I believe.
For the “Theresa ” thread, click the “share your story ” and scroll down. You’ll see that you’re not alone. The mums offer words of support and advice, even though they have their own troubles.
I understand the “loss”, like you’re grieving for the son he used to be, I did that too. Please have faith and strength, mostly look after yourself.
Take care
Lx ❤️