The main thing is don’t think your alone, read through this forum and you will see just how widespread this is. Family and friends won’t get it, unless they have loved an addict. Alcoholism is a disease and as we learn it won’t go away. I was so nieve at the beginning of my relationship with an alcoholic. I knew he had had issue in his past but not to the full extent. After 2 years the real situation became apparent. Finding empties is a classic one I believe. I remember finding vodka bottles under the bed, top of the wardrobe, even in the public bin on my street and knowing they were his. It becomes like a cat and mouse game of Gothcha ! It’s draining and ends up effecting our mental health. After everything including £10k rehab nearly 2 years on from that it’s back at square one and Iv now removed myself emotionally from the situation. He’s gone and has been 3 weeks, It feel liberating but also very sad, as when he’s not on a bender he’s a beautiful person but I need to keep telling myself I deserve better.
I was told a couple of years ago to put myself first, at the time I was so worried about him and ignored that but I now understand what I was been told. So please look after yourself as we do matter greatly in this x