Hi Lou, welcome to the forum and thank you for sharing your story with us. Everyone here has a loved one with an addiction.
Reading your story it is clear that you love your partner, you wouldn’t be putting up with it all if you didn’t!
It’s very sad that this evil drug can consume someone’s life and desensitise them to everything and everyone around them. Cocaine is highly addictive and makes them craving for more , and more is never enough. The Adhd is also an issue as I’ve read that there is a strong connection between it and addiction. Something to do with the dopamine levels in the brain.
I recognise the cycle as my son has alcohol and cocaine addictions. The alcohol triggers the need for cocaine.
He is thankfully 9 months clean.
About 2 years ago, he was about to lose everything, his job, his flat, car, us – his family. He admitted he had addiction and went to CA and AA meetings.
He had a few relapses in this time. He had to stop drinking, and stop seeing friends who drink an use.
Every day is a battle for him. But it is easier to support them when they are trying to stop
It’s a case of, Love the Addict, but hate the Addiction. He needed to know that he was loved through it all.
It’s your call here Lou, if you think you can support him through this nightmare. Or give him space to realise he has an issue and wants to seek help for himself. Either way , nothing will change until he himself makes this choice to change. Drugfam and Adfam homepage offer counselling and advice too. You have to take care of you, first and foremost.
I wish you well whatever you choose to do.
Lx ❤️