Hi, I hope you’re okay.
My Poison has never been drink but there’s alot of clear parallels between addiction with anything.
I agree with the previous reply, the fact you are hiding bottles means you know you’re drinking more than you want your family to know and coming on here looking for support is a huge thing so be proud of yourself for having the courage to address it.
So right now I guess you’re in the stage where, you’re still functioning, no one has found out and confronted you and if thing stayed like this forever, you could continue as long as you wanted.
The waking up and telling yourself no more is you’re genuine regret and desire to stop but throughout the day you forget about the negatives it makes you feel and the part of your brain that is addicted starts thinking about the pleasure you get from having a drink. No matter how bad you felt I’m the morning, by the afternoon that seems to Iike a distant memory and it’s almost like “well nothing too bad happend, I had a drink, knowone found out and I still managed to do life today so why not”
I lived like that for years until I was caught and my world fell apart.
My advice for you as hard as it may be. Tell your family what’s going on. That will be so much better than them finding out themselves. This also means that when you start to battle the addiction, you can be open with them. You may have down days, but they will know why, you might have physical effects from withdrawl like not sleeping and it’s so much easier to not have to lie about why that is. Also they can help you, they will know what to look out for and even knowing that people around you are aware that will help your battle when telling yourself no, I’m not drinking tonight because you’ll either worry someone will notice or you won’t want to let them down.
I know this will be a secret that you have tried so hard to keep from your loved ones but if they love you they will not judge and they will support you through this.
Addiction is not a choice and it does not make you a bad person.
I promise you the second you tell someone about it, you’ll feel a huge weight lifted and you won’t have to face this alone.
Stay strong, you got this x