Hi
I’m so sorry to read that you are having such a difficult time due to your husband’s addiction and that it’s making you so ill.
Maybe you would like to talk to us at Icarus Trust as we are a charity that supports people having to deal with addiction in the family as you are. We offer trained and experienced people we call Family Friends who would talk with you and understand what you are going through. They would also be able to let you know what other help is available for you.
If you think that would help please contact us at contact@icarustrust.org
All the best to you.