and don’t you dare feel guilty about putting your needs first! you’ve every right to feel happy, safe and respected in your life and home. it’s okay to say No.. this isn’t good for me. And walk away, even maybe not a permanent separation or divorce, just a break from it all and see if he comes up trumps or not.
He doesn’t see an issue with taking coke frequently. You do. (i would too!) Until there is a compromise from those two polar positions there will be problems.
Put yourself first and think about all the lovely things you could be doing instead of dealing with this misery xxx