I’ve posted on here before after my 15 year relationship broke down. I was married with a mortgage, four children and the usual normal things in life. As far as I was aware, everything was brilliant. My husband worked away mon-friday, we had lovely holidays and a comfortable life… Then came the secret Life he had so cleverly hidden for years.
I found empty bags inside a sock in his work bag! I confronted him and he lied and lied and lied. That’s all he seemed to do. It was neverending and so convincing. I kicked him out and then his mail that he had cunningly redirected started coming. Thousands of pounds worth of debt. We sold our home and he went on a bender with his profits.
He didn’t bother with our children, not even on special occasions. We were left grieving as a family. This man was unrecognisable.
Fast forward 3 years.. He is now living in sheltered accommodation. He now smokes crack and injects amphetamines. I took him to court because on occasion he has turned up at the children’s school to see them. He is subject to a court order now and gets one day a week supervised visits.
His skin is grey and he looks like he’s one step away from death.
He still lies and manipulates anybody he can. He uses dating platforms to guilt vulnerable people into lending him money. He has had help and is continuously offered help and support but he continues this lifestyle.
I have had years of counselling and so have my children.
I never saw the signs when we was together. I lived in a bubble and I was blind to it.