Coco, I’m so sorry for what you’ve been put through, you and your children. I really hope you’ll be able to rebuild your trust and your relationship.
Brianna, I’m likewise so sorry to read what you’re going through now. It definitely my sounds like your boyfriend is in denial, and there are probably more excuses to come. I’ve had the same excuses and more – it’s only his life, and his to mess up, for example.
I know it’s hard because it feels like letting go of someone you love, but these are his choices pushing you apart, they would not be yours. Meanwhile, you do need to think of yourself and your children – you don’t want to be dragged down with him. You can still be there to support his recovery, because he’ll need love and support and hope to make it work. But you can’t do that if you replace the love and trust with resentment and suspicion.