Worriedsister I can’t imagine what having two loved on such substances is like. I only had to deal with one and my mental health took such a downward spiral, it was extremely difficult looking after the children and struggling with mental health and dealing with an addict who simply was very much under the drug and the dealers control.
Maybe you need to get some counselling just so you can vent your feelings. This forum and counselling helped me. Don’t me wrong I’m a different person now I trust no one and suspicious of everyone. Which isn’t the life I wanted but unfortunately the drugs don’t just change the user.