Hi Debbie,
I’m not sure what to say. This is classic addict behaviour.
Him saying you’re lucky he’s still there… in what crazy world is that lucky? But they say it and they believe it’s normal to say that.
Look at this rationally, you’re not having an affair, you’re not a drug addict with mood swings, you’re not wasting money, you’re not doing anything wrong. All you are asking is that he stop using cocaine, for his health, his mental well-being, your relationship, for money reasons. Yet you are being blamed for causing ‘this’ just because you want him to stop doing something you don’t like or agree with.
It’s like coke addicts have all read a crap book on how to be an asshole to your partner…. They are literally all the same!!
This situation will destroy you slowly if he refuses to accept he has a problem or accepts it but won’t do anything about it, it amounts to the same thing.
They all lie, they all hide stuff. They’re secretive and then blame you for being suspicious! This isn’t what normal relationships are like.
I don’t know what to tell you in terms of how to handle it. Just be careful and if you need to leave. Leave xx