Hi James
I’ve re-read your post and I just want to ask when you have had a day & or night on cocaine do you actually wake up and remember the day before? do you know what you said? You said you feel guilty is this because you lied. I’m sorry if I’m dragging up things but your advice is very grateful
Is this why you want to sleep all day and only wake up to eat do you know this is because of your use? I’m trying to understand as today he has slept all day. I woke up not very well and had to cancel my day until my medication worked which they did 3 hours in.
He had to do a call which he did I stayed in my room then came down to get water I said to him I’m going to shower then clean upstairs he said he needed an hour which is fine. When he knew I was cleaning he got anxious. (I think I know why) white powder on floor & I found it in a cupboard!!!!! I didn’t say anything I went about getting it done he slept.
When I finished I said let’s go for lunch out he said I’m not well and went to bed (I’m sad) He was anxious around me. I felt I shouldn’t be there that I’m in the way.
I went out anyway. When I came back he was still asleep. I made dinner he ate it and has gone back to sleep is this because he took it last night and is on a come down? Does it make you sleep that much.
When did you get cravings? Is it always the same time? I know you said it’s a voice in his head and I know I have to write this letter I’m just so upset I don’t think I will ever trust him again and I don’t think he is going to be willing to be tested or talk to me about it. I guess I know it’s going to be over and I need to be prepared.
It’s also not that easy to leave as I have another situation to attend to which I have others depending on me but I also know I need to look after myself otherwise my condition is going to flare up and I’m going to be unwell.
Thank you again for your advice and guidance through my situation.
Navy xx