It’s so crazy isn’t it – we are walking around like everything is ok, it’s exhausting! I thought I was ok but I can’t sleep now as so anxious he will come back – I text him to say I bolted the door but he’s unpredictable when he’s like this so now just laying here stressing!
So yours has left Purpleheart? Is he keeping in touch? It’s so hard with kids as you want to protect them from the truth and make sure they’re happy – did he just go tonight?
Bellapop I think the trust has totally gone for me now- I literally don’t believe a word he’s saying most of the time. I was secretly testing him as that was the only way to get the truth! We don’t deserve a relationship like that though!
He has no where else to go as he burnt all his bridges a long time ago (except me!).
It’s been like this from about 6 months into our relationship (before that I knew he did it but thought it was ‘recreational’ – stupid word) so 5 years now – he had a good phase and we had a baby but it got a lot worse when I was pregnant (I found out he had a lifelong drug problem) – he almost died from pneumonia (caused by drugs I think but who knows really) so there was quite a big gap where things were ‘good’ as he couldn’t leave the house but it’s been about 2 months now he’s been back on it, lying, manipulative as you both know what they’re like….
I was trying to pretend it was ok as he said he’d stop (again) but I just couldn’t forgive and forget this time and I think he sensed it so probably why we ended up arguing. If it wasn’t for our son I just wish I he never met him as horrible as that sounds. Sorry for being negative!
In the time I’ve been with him it’s been one long crazy rollercoaster actually quite unbelievable some of the things that have happened and all the time I just get up go to work get the kids sorted and act like everything’s fine!
Sending hugs to both of you and positive vibes, we deserve to be happy xxx