Hi fayzey
I’m so gutted about your situation he’s a plank I do hope he gets into rehab asap for you and that he wants to do it, he has to believe in himself too. I totally agree with you for feeling apprehensive with him and well done on you for still being there your one strong lady ????????
I’m doing ok apart from slight pains in my chest think it’s nerves when I’m due to get home.
You are the only people I talk to regularly I have been into Samaritans when we have rowed and talk to frank. Otherwise I’m on my own, I’m even lying to my family to protect him. It hurts.
I’ve been to the gym today as it’s my day off and really enjoyed it. Good endorphins running around my body. Made me feel good.
I found that stuff on my kitchen floor, yep I’ve become paranoid about it, I know what it looks like, tastes like and smells like!!!
I’ve spent my day in a blur he was working so I sat in the kitchen quietly until he finished then made food, he was talking about how much stress he is under how nobody understands he has to explain everything (he the bloody boss) I was angry but kept quiet. He didn’t eat his food said he was feeling sick!!! Too much stress
He told me he knows how upset Iam with him and he doesn’t think he will make this holiday he will be dead!! Nice thing to say, so I said do you want to cancel it, he says you don’t want to go with me (correct) but I didn’t say that I told him I’m so scared that your going to have anxiety attack and how am I going to cope. He got upset and yet again couldn’t talk to me and went up to his room.
I just want to scream at him and tell him to give up the drugs and your health will be better the anxiety attacks will stop and you wont have high blood pressure because your doing this to yourself that’s why your so bloody unwell aasrrrggghhh. (Sorry) but feels good to get that off my chest.
Thank you for all being here
Love to you all
XXX