Hello Mum2sons, so sorry to hear about your son and what you are going through trying to support him, please know that most of us on this forum are going through or have gone through similar situations to you. You have to look after yourself first, easy to say, hard to do. Set your boundaries and try to keep to them. It is soul destroying watching someone you love just going down and down and hoping that they will realise that they have to stop whatever it is they are addicted to. However you can’t do it for him and making yourself ill with worry is not the answer, please try to look after yourself, marriage and job. I did this for fifty years with my brother and he is still an addict, I supported him financially, he lived with me and my family for many years over that time period and all I have done is take it all on my shoulders. I am trying really hard to stick to the advise that I have given you, but it is not easy.
