Hi Both of you,
I feel so so sorry for you both. I know the situation only too well, but I am many years past it now. My husband died 10 years ago and was an alcoholic, my Son was 5 at the time. We had already left him, due to his drinking.
My message is…you cannot stop them, the personal cost to yourselves and your own health is too great. It comes to a point of the fact that you must look after yourselves, before the suffering becomes too great. For children, they cannot be in a home with a parent who drinks to excess. It will be highly damaging for them.
Therefore, please put yourselves and your future child first. Don’t go back if you have left. It’s not your responsibility to keep the addicts alive, they are responsible for themselves. You have to be healthy to be a good parent to your child / children.
Only we know, the hardship living with a chaotic life of an addict. You both deserve normal lives. Take any means you can and leave the situation. Don’t worry about him threatening to take the baby away ( Georgina ), that’s nonsense. My ex used to threaten all kinds of things, I was petrified at the time. Ultimately he can’t even conduct his own life, let alone look after a child, anyone can see that. Keep evidence of everything that happens, he’s been sacked now and didn’t attend the conference, keep records of the dates of every event.
I wish you both luck and courage you beautiful souls, don’t let horrible addicts ruin your lives…get out.x