Hi Amy1 – sorry to hear what you’re going through. My partner of 6 years recently broke up with me – I think it’s over cocaine though he would just keep saying that he loves me but he can’t be a partner right now and he doesn’t know what he wants. But when we were together, I remember asking myself the same thing (and sometimes asking him) – why would he want to spend all night gaming with his friends and not come home (and have to sleep almost the whole day the next day so there goes our weekend), instead of spending a nice evening with me. I then learned that all those long gaming nights involve using cocaine. It probably started off recreationally like that and then ended up being way worse now. It’s horrible, and until today, I still can’t really accept that our relationship ended this way. Just wanted to share my own story, hopefully that helps you feel that you’re not alone. Sorry I don’t have a solution or advice for you (I too wish I have a magic wand), but this forum has given me much comfort, and I hope you find some here too.
Take care XX